Hellboy Held Up, Avengers Eventually

Last week floated the question of whether I’d be reviewing the Hellboy reboot this week. The answer is … no. Sorry, everybody eagerly awaiting my review!

I both do & don’t want to see it. I really wanted Hellboy 3 by Guillermo del Toro starring Ron Perlman! Mike Mignola’s stark minimalism was almost diametrically opposed to del Toro’s lush maximalism but it worked! (I’ve heard gossip that Mignola being displeased with the movies diverging so much from the comics was a factor in nixing the third one.) I would’ve been fine seeing this one providing the trilogy had finished, but it didn’t. The monsters in the trailers (where Hellboy says he’s a Capricorn despite being a Libra in the comics) look nifty, but both general reviewers & Hellboy fans say it’s not good. I kind of feel bad skipping it since I’ll probably end up seeing the much worse looking Dark Phoenix in theaters. The original was released in April too, but I still think October would be a better fit (especially with all the competition this month). I was thinking about seeing it at a matinee, but the timing hasn’t worked out yet. Maybe I’ll get to it once it’s completely irrelevant?

So this almost late installment will mostly be about tangential Avengers tidbits that would’ve made my forthcoming review of the next movie even more long-winded.

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Sabrina Spellman Sidesteps Satanic Sophomore Slump?

After last week’s somewhat less horrific magic of Captain Marvel: DC Edition SHAZAM!, I’m overviewing The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina season two! This is being touted as “Part 2” since it was filmed back to back with the first.  Since most network shows are in the twenty episode range & take time off for the winter holidays, it’s arguable that it is still season one. So this headline might be premature! (Is the next group going to be called “CAOS Part 3″ or “CAOS Season 2 Part 1?”) As this batch is nine episodes to the first part’s ten, it feels appropriate to review the “bonus” holiday episode here too. Trigger warning for moral relativism in comparative religion & SPOILERS!

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Sabrina Spellman is Satan’s perfect match?

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Is Shazam! Marvelous?

Holy moley! I saw a cuddle pile of ferrets! Then I saw Shazam! at my first Alamo Drafthouse with the friend of the blog, The Wages of Cinema’s Jack Gattanella. SPOILERY collaboreview strikes like lightning below!

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Hail To Thea Queen Of The Toy Chest!

I finally gave up waiting for DC Collectibles or Mattel (or even Soap Studios) to produce (Green) Arrow’s best character. (The other alternative was this unlicensed 1/6 costume set that doesn’t even include a 12″ figure to wear it.) Toy Fair 2019 confirmed she’s not in the cards. This Thea “Speedy” Queen was made from a Civil War Scarlet Witch action figure. The notion came to me just as I was going to make the MCU toy more comics accurate with a tiara & red pants. I suddenly realized that not only was this costume already close to Speedy’s (The CW’s debuted first), the Elizabeth Olsen head sculpt could pass for Willa Holland. (I’ve never seen the two of them in the same place…) Plus the right hand was already in an acceptable arrow-nocking position, & the vertical hinge in her left wrist would work for archery poses. It’d save me a lot of work as opposed to the fantastic one bluebery practically sculpted from the ground up.

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“Come get some!”

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Black Lightning & The Flash Get Lit

I’ve finally seen all the Leprechaun films! Only the Warwick Davis ones count, mind you. I’ve learned Leprechaunitis is transmitted by biting. This is unrelated to the rest of this entry. I just thought you should know.

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Black Lightning just had its second season finale, so it’s time to check back in on it! The headline spoils I discuss The Flash afterwards! (It also signals “get lit” is over as a hip idiom.) Both Jefferson Pierce & Barry Allen are family men with lightning bolts on their costumes.

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Does Captain Marvel Live Up To Its Title?

For my fourth blogiversary, I’m doing a SPOILERY collaboreview with The Wages of Cinema for Captain Marvel! It only took twenty-one films, but Marvel Studios finally has a solo superheroine & a female (co-)director!

You can read the rest by Skrullin’ scrolling higher lower, further, faster, baby!

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Only Binary opinions on Captain Marvel are allowed.

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Gotham Will Be Gone Soon

So my plan is to recap the four fun episodes of Gotham that aired since the last time I wrote about it. (I’ve actually received reader requests in the interim.) Then I can do another blog about the final three, perhaps two if I just want to discuss the series finale by itself. Of course this SPOILER-laden blog is going to be obscured by Captain Marvel hype due to overlapping schedules.

This series has benefited from progressively faster pacing each season. (They gave an entire season’s worth of plot to Alfred in a single episode last year, yet there was so much going on in the midseason premiere I didn’t even mention it!) With only half the normal amount of episodes, the plot points are now zooming by! This year they’re in the unenviable position of both having to to tell a No Man’s Land story & start wrapping up the whole series.

I continue to be gobsmacked at how bonkers Gotham remains despite lacking aliens, time travel, & alternate realities. (All are valid in a Batman adaptation.) Smallville had all those yet the handful of episodes I watched still managed to be bland. Not only is it superior to Fox’s other comic book show, It works better with “Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me” than Batman Forever footage. Where are my final season Broad City/Gotham mash-up vids at? Make it a threesome by throwing in Game of Thrones! What’ll happen when the the world runs out of the diverse array of indignant Penguin reactions?

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