I Got 99 Problems, But Bestselling Ain’t One!

Thank you very much to everyone who downloaded a freebie of Brother Banenose last week! Not only did it start the week off as #1 in free historical fantasy, it wrapped up as #4 in both free historical fantasy & free LGBT fantasy! Nobody gives away intangibles better than Runaway Goodness! And nobody accepts them better than YOU!


The free period is over, but you can still get it for $2.99 for the rest of November. The morning after the promotion ended, it was #99 in non-free LGBT fantasy & #110 in non-free humorous fantasy! Barely making it onto a non-free top 100 list officially qualifies it a legitimutant best seller! Thank you very much, paying customers, for giving me a bona fide excuse to coin the term legitimutant!


Then on Sunday, it popped up to #83 just to undermine the dated reference in my headline. Look whose book it beat out:


Yup, I outsold THE Stephen Fry in this category. Even temporarily, this does not compute. Stephen Fry would be an excellent narrator for the audiobook, by the way.

I’m still avaricious enough to want to climb even higher in the rankings, so please continue to purchase the book or get other people to do it for you by adding it to your wishlists. A fortnight ago, I signed a big stack of paperbacks. In fact, I’ve signed every paperback I’ve had the pleasure of meeting thus far. So unsigned paperbacks of my debut novel may actually be rarer than the ones I’ve defaced with inscriptions & doodles. Pristine copies cou actually be worth a lot more money one day!

So now that people that I don’t know are reading my book, I’d like to hear what you think about it. Should I backtrack on my current plan to not write a sequel? Or should I not write another book, period? Tell me in the comments. Or you can click the heart icon to let me hear your opinion on a social feed of your choice.

Now here’s an interview with d20 RouletteI met half their team through the superlative fictional resource UncannyXMen.net & its equally amazing fan forum, Unstable Molecules. This was my first Skype interview:



I did a new ToplessRobot The Robot’s Voice listicle: The 10 Best Fictional Heroes and Villains With Prosthetic Limbs. The title changed after I submitted it to focus more on the characters themselves instead of their prostheses, which is why some prominent ones are absent.  Forge would’ve gotten on the list for making his own if only they were spiffier.

Monstress #1 by Marjorie Liu & Sana Takeda was great! I suspect the twin-tailed cats may be vampires.

So in season two of Fargo, did Rye Gerhardt get the full Mrs. Lovett treatment? Were folks unknowingly buying long pig?

Livewire was portrayed well on Supergirl although her just wearing regular clothes was a disappointment. Since she’s an energy being, they could’ve had her use her powers to reconfigure her clothing into a flashy costume. If cosplayers can pull off the costume well in three dimensions then a professional TV wardrobe department shouldn’t have any excuse. After all, they figured out how to make I can’t believe it’s not Metallo Reactron look decent & nobody ever dresses up like him for cons. Even though the silver wig looked better than any on (Green) Arrow, I would’ve at least liked Brit Morgan to sport a blue pixie mohwak instead. Still it wasn’t as big a travesty as movie Electro not wearing a starfish lightning mask, a.k.a. the most interesting thing about Electro.

The alien in the beginning was a nod to Rampage. It felt off to cast a man & have the gender reveal as a punchline instead of just casting a female body builder. It’s also wasteful not to use her as the main foe of an episode since the pool of mid-level metahumans that The F-Lash hasn’t already called dibs on can’t be that deep. There’s some good parallels between both her & Supergirl being solar powered but Rampage resenting hers because they make her crazed & unscientific. The generic black trenchcoat might’ve been the worst part though.

“Say something nice about Gotham!” Missy was on!

Tuesday’s TV saw a battle of the current & former Grodds. Agents of SHIELD lost by offering up a dumb retcon veering dangerously close to “The Draco” territory about how HYDRA used to have a ram logo. The F-Lash won an all expenses paid vacation to Gorilla City of Earth-2 to recruit a simian army.

“Some day our noses will meet in the flesh” may be the most romantic thing I’ve heard on TMNT. As a TMNT Adventures fan, I’m also really happy to see Armaggon, voiced by Ron Perlman no less. I’d prefer it if Lord Dregg was Maligna as the current version is (thankfully) Dregg in name only. Aside from how it’s animated, Half-Shell Heroes: Blast to the Past could’ve been part of the regular cartoon, which is good.

WordPress changed its post making format so now I can’t tell if I’m meeting or exceeding my ideal 666 word count. I could always paste these ramblings into Word, but who needs an extra step?

Nevermind! I located the word counter & I’m writing way too much.


3 thoughts on “I Got 99 Problems, But Bestselling Ain’t One!

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