SDCC Turned Fifty?

HUZAH! It’s the fiftieth anniversary of San Diego Comic Convention! I didn’t attend, thanks for asking. (I took last week off anyway after reviewing Stranger Things 3.) Did you? Here is my armchair event coverage (loosely arranged by DC, Marvel, & miscellaneous mess) that’s rapidly losing topicality! Wait, shouldn’t it be celebrating it golden anniversary next year?

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The CWverse trailers were scant since the shows just began filming the next season, with Supergirl having the best available. Lena punched Kara in her lying face! (Lena Luthor wears Captain Marvel’s clothes, although they should’ve used the green & purple palette swap from the movie.) James Olsen is departing, & there will be much rejoicing! All it took for Kara to change her costume was her Kasnian counterpart making fun of the skirt. (I wonder if they tried giving Melissa Benoist thermal stockings?) It looks like the Elseworld’s Finest outfit, but it’s too bad she didn’t commit to the hair like Barbara Kean.

Legends of Tomorrow won at bags! Sadly there’s no Gentleman Ghost confirmation yet. Brandon Routh will return as Superman for Crisis on Infinite Earths! Apparently he’ll be Kal-El of Kingdom Come not Superman Returns because arbitrarily dickish WB won’t let them use the costume, although maybe his movie would’ve eventually led to that if it got sequels. Burt Ward will be back, possibly as aged Dick Grayson.

Sadly there was no trailer for Wonder Woman 1984. I guess they haven’t finished fine tuning the fur on Kristen Wiig’s Cheetah. At long last, however, WB is making a second solo Wonder Woman animated film with lots of supervillainesses.

DC Universe’s Harley Quinn animated series looks like The Venture Brothers & therefore right up my alley (Kite-Man: Hell yeah!), but I’m not sold on her voice yet. I’d prefer Francesca Root Dodson over Kaley Cuoco. I’m surprised there wasn’t a trailer for Harley Quinn’s Mouthful Title Co-Starring Some Birds Of Prey.

Mattel’s SDCC booth was marginally better than its Toy Fair one. KGBeast finally gets a (non-animated) toy! Killer Croc looks keen. He’s bigger than I’d like, but this is appropriate to the Rebirth era. Note he has the same pants holes as Solomon Grundy & King Shark. Alfred with an assortment of alternate heads is amazing!

You can get a statue commemorating Catwoman not marrying Batman!

Sideshow’s spooky Scarecrow statue supports my supposition that Jason Todd is better dead than red. Adorable Beast Boy monkey on Cyborg-Roomba comes with a sultry Starfire statue!

Netflix, not DC Universe, is making an expensive Sandman TV show. I can’t wait for this to be abruptly cancelled after three seasons!

I’m still not sure what to think of HBO’s Watchmen. It’ll probably be as superfluous as Before Watchmen & Doomsday Clock, but it looks like there’s a chance it’ll be worthwhile? I can’t be too down on Damon Lindelof writing Watchmen fanfic since the original was Alan Moore’s Charlton Comics fanfic.

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Aside from the incorrect blue eyes, DST’s Jubilee statue is perfect!

X-Men Barbies will be exclusive to GameStop.

Hasbro’s next Avengers assortment is all MCU. Heimdall finally gets a Marvel Legend to go with his sword Hasbro kept giving to Thor, but unfortunately it’s not his cool bronze armor of the first two Thor movies. Armored Valkyrie needs a winged steed like Endgame’s Iron Patriot needs Rocket Raccoon cosplaying Sly Cooper. The BAF is fat Thor in his The Big Lebowski punchline phase instead of his inspiring final battle phase. We still don’t have a Captain Marvel in her inverted or neon colors! She’d sell better than a rerelease of nobody’s favorite Captain America costume.

After its Friday panel, it seems like Hasbro wants me to funnel my entire bank account directly to it. I don’t like the concept of Cosmic Ghost Rider, but he seems like a cool toy. Clearly they hate Vulture (who kind of resembles Peter Boyle) just as much as I do since he only gets stripes cheaply painted on his torso instead of getting them etched all over like Mysterio. Gray She-Hulk appears too slight, but the new Dr. Doom looks just like a scaled down Sideshow statute! They’re even making his arch-nemesis: Squirrel Girl is finally getting a Marvel Legends! It comes with a bonus Vespa! (It’s a lucky thing I like Vespas, or I would be mad about being forced to pay double to get her. They could’ve made her stockier for that premium too.) I knew Hasbro would time this reveal for the end of her series. Now when will the cowards release the New Warriors TV series?

It only took them seven years, but they’re finally producing Dani Moonstar with swappable Wolfsbane & Karma parts as a Walgreens exclusive. You’ll buy triplicate & like it! I still want this Wolfsbane head on an X-Factor body, which reminds me how I appreciate the Havok & Polaris set despite preferring one of Polaris’s sleeveless costumes. How many Age of Apocalypse action figures will I end up with?

Hall H & beyond went nuts over the MCU’s Phase 4 announcements. At this point Marvel Studios doesn’t even have to confirm new X-Men movies to make people lose their minds. Too bad Captain Marvel & Black Panther sequels are so far off they don’t even have release dates. Hopefully there will be a third Wasp & Ant-Man too.

Tony Leung is The Manadrin in Shang-Chi & the Legend of the Ten Rings. His rings better be alien alien technology of assorted functionality. Perhaps they can finally feature a Fin Fang Foom face-off? The prophetic Simu Liu is its eponymous master of kung-fu.

The Eternals has a big cast. I refuse to get excited about it yet since I’m not a real fan. Oddly the most famous Eternal, Sersei, wasn’t confirmed. (Perhaps this is who they’re trying to sign Millie Bobby Brown for?) Gligamesh the Forgotten One better wear his bovine hat! Supposedly this is Marvel’s apology for bungling Inhumans, but what if it’s lousy too? I preemptively pity Ava DuVernay’s New Gods movie for not being done ahead of it.

Doctor Strange In The Multiverse of Madness has a fun name, horror vibe, & Scarlet Witch! Hopefully Clea, Brother Voodoo, Nightmare, Shuma-Gorath, Agatha Harknes, & Rintrah will be join her.

In Falcon & Winter Soldier Captain America & White Wolf, Zemo puts on the mask he should’ve had on in the first place? Monica Rambeau will be all grown-up in WandaVision, which tracks since you can’t see without Photon.

Taika Waititi is making Thor Love & Thunder Forever while live action Akira is indefinitely on hold so everyone wins! Apparently Queen Valkyrie is searching for her Queen, who should be Carol Danvers. I wonder what else they’ll do storywise, as much remaining elements from the comics seem redundant in light of earlier movies. Beta Ray Bill would be great to see in the cybernetic horseflesh, but they’ve already done Surtur & Stormbreaker without him. Agents of SHIELD alluded to Amora the Enchantress, but her boytoy/lackey, Skurge the Executioner, was paired with Hela. (Could they substitute Ulik?) They also gave her Angela’s secret sister backstory. With the Asgardians in such disarray, the Godbutcher feels superfluous. It’s a bit late to develop The Warriors Three, but hopefully Sif is available to return. Oh, Jane Foster is becoming Thor, Goddess of Thunder. Since the SHAZAM angle has long been dropped, Natalie Portman better start hefting all the hammers!

Marvel is bringing back Blade with Mahershala Ali as the Daywalker. (He joins Stan Lee, Enver Gjokaj, Tony Curran, Paul Bettany, Laura Haddock, Alfre Woodard, Benedict Cumberbatch, Kenneth Choi, Clancy Brown, & Clark Gregg in having multiple MCU roles.) Apparently he got the job by telling Kevin Feige to give it to him after winning his second Oscar. Ali knows how to ice skate uphill! Blade should battle Baron Blood. You can’t start with fighting Dracula on the moon or you have nowhere to go in the sequel but down. Sony unfortunately has the Morbius the Living Vampire rights, but maybe they could  replace him in a Midnight Sons team-up film with Werewolf By Night.

This fourth Fantastic Four reboot ought to star The New Fantastic Four. Three Human Torches in a cinematic universe is one too many.

Fans sussed out which will be the first batch of X-Men titles relaunced for Dawn of X. Why is Jean Grey wearing her ugly Marvel Girl costume & Nightcrawler not swashbuckling on Marauders? The new logo font is awkward. All right, that’s enough comic book news for SDCC.

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NECA’s animated April O’Neil includes the bufflinks ransom note! I appreciate that & hope the Target distribution improves so I can fritter my funds away more efficiently on toon turtles two-packs.

Look at all the characters on the new DuckTales poster! TaleSpin’s Molly Cunningham & Kit Cloudkicker are all grown up! Is that Butterbear from The Wuzzles? Why must we wait so long to see new episodes featuring Glomgold’s supervillain team?

Disney remembered it owns the right to the Rocketeer! DST is making action figure from the movie. There’s a new The Rocketeer cartoon? Her helmet isn’t as rad as the original. (I wonder if IDW’s Rocketeer Reborn was aborted to make way for this?) Dave Stevens was posthumously inducted into the Eisner Awards Hall of Fame.

Kristen Schaal is evil incarnate, whereas Conan O’Brien was bitten by a radioactive party clown at his quinceañera,

Instead of focusing on film, the convention was all about television trailers. It’s a pity you need multiple streaming service subscriptions to see most of them. Amazon really rescued The Expanse! Picard looks a lot like Logan but with surprise 7 of 9. Does H. Jon Benjamin discover Tribbles in a horror short? I haven’t read the books or played the video games, so The Witcher TV series looks pretty good to me. Carnival Row somewhat less so, although Cara Delevigne was born to play a pixie with Tiffany wings & an improbably mellifluous name. Although I’m still disappointed by the studio interference that undermined The Golden Compass, His Dark Materials also looks like a worthy adaptation. Now that I’ve read the rest of the series, however, I’m progressively less excited about the sequels being adapted.

Hot Toys is doing a 1/6 Wicket. What’s Hasbro’s excuse for not making a 1/12 version? The cowards should make a Black Series Cal Kestis too just so I can customize it into the Valeksa twins. (Now that Star Was has two Jokers thanks Jedi Fallen Order, they need to send Jack Nicholson a swimming pool full of moolah for a hat trick.)

The trailers for Cats & the Top Gun sequel dropped during SDCC despite neither seeming particularly on brand for it. The Cats trailer wasn’t as terrifying as I was promised. (Sonic The Hedgehog better be redesigning its lead with multiple rows of oscillating teeth to compensate for the lack of nightmare fuel! It needs a fast food tie-in with Sonic the restaurant too.) Since Marvel hasn’t deigned to release the Black Widow trailer to commoners yet, it’s also SDCC’s best movie trailer? (Last year had much stiffer competition.) It’s so intriguingly peculiar that at this point I’m more hyped for it than the Star Wars counter-programming. (Maybe they shouldn’t have waited nine episodes to call this one The Rise of Skywalker? They better include some Ewoks if they want to get my attention!) Why does the scale keep changing? Why don’t they have proper kitty noses? Taylor Swift’s cinematic debut as Bombalurina resembles Catwoman from that polarizing BTAS episode. How will WW2’s Cheetah possibly compete? Despite the commercial promising it’d play there “now & forever,” I never got to see it on Broadway. The movie better include the flying saucer tire! Bring on Starlight Express next!

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The banana’s dramatic entrance is being kept under wraps.

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So that was the “fiftieth” SDCC. As someone who wasn’t there, it seemed more lowkey than usual? I was expecting to hear of anniversary galas, although maybe they’re being saved for the actual fiftieth anniversary next year. (I’m starting to wonder why I made separate tags for annual conventions.) Please comeback next week for something that’s hopefully more punctual (not likely) & esoteric!

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