Justice League Snyder Cut Discourse Is Served!

Welcome to my sixth blogiversary! I had three different blogs in progress (DuckTales series finale, The Flash’s “season Finale,” Justice League Snyder cut) for the stacked events of this anniversary week. I let the people vote, & they chose violence the Snyder cut by a huge margin. Nobody voted for the poor F-Lash, which may explain when last year’s anniversary blog performed poorly despite an adorable Grodd pic. (Aren’t they all?) Keep your eyes peeled for the two losing blogs sometime in the near future.

Black Widow is the opposite of the Snyder cut in the sense that it existed before the pandemic yet its studio doesn’t want you to watch it at home post-pandemic. (If a movie needed $70 million extra dollars for special effects & reshoots, it did not exist in a finished state before.) The Snyder cut of Justice League is being reviewed … elsewhere! Sorry! I still want clickbait visits, just not enough to subscribe to HBOMax. I can’t even afford to review the official tie-in meal kit that sounds like an expensive prank. I have no journalistic integrity! For actual critical analysis, refer to my blogs on Superman & Lois, The Flash, & WandaVision. Here are SPOILERS for a movie I’ve yet to see, so all my spoilers could be wrong? This could be a fun comparison game for you to play at home. So you’re not already sick of this discourse, this blog’s for you!

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Check out the leaked pic of Stryfe from Deadpool 3!

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Birds Of Prey V. The Suicide Squad: Dawn Of Posters

WB released some tidbits about Birds Of Prey & The Suicide Squad. I’ll get to them, but this is merely an excuse to write about various DC Comics things in the backlog! I know you’re only coming here for my Gotham cold takes anyway.

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Spider-Rant, Spider-Rant, Does Whatever A Spider-Man Can’t

The big news is Sony revoked Spider-Man’s hyphen! Now we have to call him Spiderman as if it’s his surname! He’s not going to be in the MCU anymore either. When you’re done freaking out about that, please take a moment to also freak out about the Amazon rain forest being on fire for weeks.

I was working on a Spidey-rant too, but nobody warned me I had to have it edited so fast for it to be topical. This installment was supposed to be cat anecdotes! I blame my custom Scarlet Witch’s hex bolts! Of course the same week I mentioned Moon Knight, we got a Moon Knight TV show announcement at D23. So you can thank me for that at least. (Ms. Marvel & She-Hulk are also getting Disney+ series! So is Kamala Khan still going to be Inhuman or will she be the MCU’s first mutant? I’m both excited for a She-Hulk TV series & terrified of how easy it’d be to screw it up.)

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“I do not wear the fishbowl. The fishbowl wears me!”

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The LEGO Movie 2 Is Awesome, Obviously

As you’d expect, The LEGO Movie 2: The Second Part is awesome. There, that’s the zero spoilers review. Go see it. (Then keep reading this. It also contains non-LEGO musings.)

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I Can Put Mysterio In A Headline Now!

Now that I’ve finished slagging off Doctor Who, I resume my habit of having no discernible topic! There’s a mishmash of potentially spoilery Punisher, Gotham, & Aquaman musings below. But first let’s chat about Mysterio again because the time is finally ripe!

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Is Aquaman Out Of His Depth?

Aquaman, Aquaman, does whatever water can! I was predisposed to liking Aquaman, but I didn’t expect the movie to be tailored specifically to me! Jack & Andrew on the The Wages of Cinema collaboreview can corroborate that it is a legitimutantly enjoyable comic book movie! OUTRAGEOUS!

Dive below for Davy Jones’s locker of SPOILERS!

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SDCC Struck Again!

San Diego Comic Con 2018 just happened. (As expected, nobody cared about “Fiction & Felines!” while it was occurring.) I have opinions. Armchair coverage & the possible spoilers associated therewith happen below.

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The biggest news out of this year’s SDCC is … Cutthroat Island is finally getting toys!  Thanks to Blitzway, you can own a Hot Toys-style replica from the film that sunk pirate movies until until Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl surprised everyone! Congratulations, Geena Davis!

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Justice League Is Served!

Ice! Mr. Freeze! Captain Cold! Killer Frost! Icicle! Ice Maiden! Blue Snowman! Minister Blizzard! Together they are The Just Ice League! And none of them appear in the Justice League movie!

I’m pleased to say that Justice League doesn’t suck! That doesn’t necessarily mean it’s spectacular. Do not go in expecting a Marvel Studios film. It’s a good movie but not a great movie. Much of what holds it back is having to clean up after Batman v. Superman: Dawn Of Justice. Fortunately the Justice League itself is a charismatic team instead of the maudlin worst case scenario we’d feared. The action is kinetic, the jokes are funny, & the story is coherent. So says The Wages of Cinema!

Fans of Eureka please send them feedback! Then read onward for THE SPOILERS OF JUSTICE! (They’re like the Hammers of Justice, except you can’t make bookshelves with ’em.)

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Valerian & The City Of Atomic Blonde!

With Marvel & DC’s cinematic rivalry on hold until November, we can turn our attention to film adaptions of indie comic books: Valerian & The City Of A Thousand Planets & Atomic Blonde. These two motion pictures share other commonalities too: I’ve not read either source material yet, John Goodman’s voice, & neither is doing as well at the box office as I believe they ought to be. If you want more variety in your comic book movies, support these! So (with very minimal spoilers) here’s why you should see both of them in cinemas. (But if you only want Marvel & DC movie tidbits, scroll down to where I discuss Deadpool 2 & Aquaman.)

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Toys & Trailers of SDCC 2017!

Thanks for choosing my blog to absorb your armchair SDCC 2017 coverage from! SDCC remains the statistically safest place to avoid comic book news. As someone who has been to San Diego Comic Con ONCE, you can count on me! After all, my SDCC prediction from last week came true! Lots of stuff happened, so I will do my best to ignore that thing you actually wanted to read about! Click on down because we’ve got the bait!

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