So I was going to incorporate this into the forthcoming fourth finale review of Gotham, but it’s already as long as a typical article. The finales of this, Riverdale, Arrow, Agents of SHIELD, & The Flash are all happening within a week of each other too. Even Deadpool 2 debuts then because Grodd forbid the media I’m interested in covering be spaced out. I’m not sure if those critiques will be mashed together into a gargantuan combo review (What do you suggest, readers?), but it doesn’t need to be even longer. So here’s more spoilerish Gotham gab for a week where it doesn’t bother airing because they understand everyone’s at Avengers: Infinity War anyway. (That’s next week’s blog.)
I don’t mind WB dithering on The Batman movie possibly starring Ben Affleck. This season of Gotham has become the giant-size Batman film I’ve always wanted but otherwise wouldn’t get. Mostly because brooding Batman (He’s dressed like a bat, but it’s everyone else who’s mad?) isn’t there to draw focus away from all the kooky villains. Not since BTAS have I been so invested in rooting for so many miscreants. The secret to the show’s success is to stock its sets with scrumptious scenery & let thespian foes with GIF-able faces gorge themselves upon it.
Now all they need to do is recruit Jimbo Gordon, & their barbershop quartet will be bigger than The Beatles!
“Come to Gotham City & be murdered by the world’s most flamboyant criminals!” The Gotham Gazette is 90% crime blotter & 10% upcoming events sure to become crime scenes. Security firms could make a mint in town if they weren’t cowards.
Last week this blog had another anniversary! We’re now officially into year three! True to form, I’ve nothing to show for it. I still don’t have a new publisher to get The Dolorous Adventure of Brother Banenose back into print. (Contact me if you’d like to buy one of the limited supply of signed author’s copies of the first edition I have left.) I don’t have a publisher for my second novel, which I’ve yet to complete, either. My priorities & ability to plan ahead remain out of order. Here’s an exclusive image of the scapegoat for my lack of success:
There’s no mouse this catsquatch won’t trod upon with her GOAT feet in her quest to distract me.
I dropped my phone in Walmart surrounded by strangers & the back popped off. I literally exclaimed, “Oh no! That’s bad!” That’s kind of momentous, right? (Hopefully I’m not as doomed as Toys R Us or Barnes & Noble. The impending late stage capitalism collapse of two of my favorite industries totally isn’t filling me with any existential dread.) I haven’t seen Jessica Jones season two yet, but I have quasi-spoilery recaps for assorted network comic book shows below.
A movie I really liked won lots of Oscars this year! And the Award for Best In-Universe Commercial goes to… Gotham’s The Sirens Club! Collect your trophies, Danny Cameron, Hanelle Culpepper, Erin Richards, Jessica Lucas, & Camren Bicondova! Despite its excellent club scene, the cast wisely wouldn’t live in Gotham City.
Since the season left off, I’ve found myself in Gotham withdrawal. As a show I begrudgingly sat through during season one, how did it come to this? Is (Green) Arrow so unwatchable this season that it makes Gotham look great by comparison? (Sometimes I think season six is punishment for me being the only person that hated season five.) Whilst perusing clips online, I came to the conclusion that it has progressively blossomed into a legitimutantly good show just like Agents of SHIELD! Gotham is nonsensical in a kookily entertaining way, whereas (Green) Arrow doesn’t make sense in an infuriatingly dull manner. It’s so despicable now that the boxing glove arrow not being a quiver staple no longer even makes my top five complaints. (The writers threw everyone under the bus in the worst Civil War ripoff because they were too stupid to notice that Black Siren didn’t have an opportunity to personally withdraw the extortion fund for herself! AAARRRRRGGGHHHHHH!!!!) Instead of breaking my keyboard in fury, I’ll thoroughly review the one I don’t currently loathe.
In addition to not feeling as formulaic, Gotham is a better directed series overall than The CW’s DC shows. For instance, “Pieces Of A Broken Mirror” began with with four separate plots geographically converging. We don’t yet learn if Sofia Falcone is managing crime better than Oswald Cobblepot, but there’s lots of other stuff going down. Even underused Lucius Fox gets in on it.
“Although if you pop a cap in Lee, that’d be just peachy.”
I customized some DC toys! Then I got frustrated about other DC toys that may never exist!
“The power of St. Dumas compels you!”
The Shape Of Water still isn’t playing at a theater near me yet, so I guess I’m writing about TV again this week. It’s winter finale time again for DC TV. Compared to last week’s epic Nazi-slaying crossover extravaganza, they’re on the subdued side. This year the Gotham mid-season finale (which they’re technically right in calling a season finale since its second half airs in spring) was considerate enough to line up with the CW’s. Things will be spoiled, unless you’ve seen them already. (I don’t say too much about Legends of Tomorrow as my brain has yet to fully parse its ratio of brilliant to inane this week.)
Ice! Mr. Freeze! Captain Cold! Killer Frost! Icicle! Ice Maiden! Blue Snowman! Minister Blizzard! Together they are The Just Ice League! And none of them appear in the Justice League movie!
I’m pleased to say that Justice League doesn’t suck! That doesn’t necessarily mean it’s spectacular. Do not go in expecting a Marvel Studios film. It’s a good movie but not a great movie. Much of what holds it back is having to clean up after Batman v. Superman: Dawn Of Justice. Fortunately the Justice League itself is a charismatic team instead of the maudlin worst case scenario we’d feared. The action is kinetic, the jokes are funny, & the story is coherent. So says The Wages of Cinema!
Fans of Eureka please send them feedback! Then read onward for THE SPOILERS OF JUSTICE! (They’re like the Hammers of Justice, except you can’t make bookshelves with ’em.)
After last week’s
Thor Ragnarok review, I was going to tell you how Inhumans ended. The problem is I’m so far behind on Inhumans it’s not even funny. (Let me know if anyone really wants me to go Statler & Waldorf on the rest of it.) So instead I’ll write about comic book TV shows I actually enjoy: TMNT & Gotham!
Almost every arc of the shortened Tales Of The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles season could serve as the series finale depending on which aspects of the show you prioritize. “When Worlds Collide” is the conclusion to the series’ alien intrigues. The Usagi Yojimbo arc is the most independent, but still awesome. “Lone Rat & Cubs” is a flashback coda focused on Splinter as a dad. Sadly none of the villains ever screamed “We can’t stop these radical dudes!”