Why Does Wonder Woman’s Cheetah Never Prosper?

The more I think about Wonder Woman 1984, the madder I get about it. It’s got so much sloppy writing that could’ve been fixed with another draft. Then it peppers in some great stuff that prevents me from outright writing it off. One of those was the live action debut of Cheetah, but even that could’ve been executed better. (Screen Junkies stole my alternate title!) I really shouldn’t have been surprised that the movie stumbled with Barbara Minerva when it’s precedent set by the comics & cartoons. There will be multimedia SPOILERS below because now I’ve spent an inordinate amount of time contemplating Cheetah.

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That She-Hulk blog got me hooked on tinting photos green!

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Wonder Woman 1984: Cheetahs Never Prosper

This movie is Wonder Woman 84, meaning I skipped the intervening eighty-two sequels since the original. In a controversial move, WB finally opted to simultaneously release it to cinemas & HBO Max (at no additional charge, unlike Mulan on Disney+) on Christmas day. At least its release wasn’t as postponed as The New Mutants. I watched it a movie theater because I believe the safety precautions taken by the cinema & myself are sufficient to outweigh the risk. If you think otherwise, Gal Gadon’t go because you can watch it from the safety of your home. So is Wonder Woman 1984 doubleplusgood or thoughtcrime? The Lasso of Truth compels me to unspool its SPOILERS in this collaboreview with The Wages of Cinema, reunited for the first time since Plan 9 From Star Wars!

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Come On Baby, Light My Firefly!

It took me four Marvel toys to make one DC! Can you identify them? This project was a big May Kennedy mood. This blog says Firefly frequently, so hopefully it’ll pick up some bonus traffic from diehard Browncoats.

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“Your future’s so bright, I have to wear shades. Because you’ll be aflame.”

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Because I’m Addicted To Batwoman Ideas…

Katy Keene is kaput. (Although a vampire show written by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa on ABC would’ve been terrible, I’m more upset by The Brides not getting picked up because it deprives Gina Torres & Erin Richards of showing off their fangs.) They should’ve made Josie & The Pussycats (In Outer Space) with Keene as their supporting stylist instead! At least it won’t be confusing with the CW simultaneously airing series starring Katy Keene & Kate Kane anymore… Oh yeah, this article is about me overthinking exactly how Batwoman season two is doomed.

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Because No One Demanded It: Cats Continued!

You ever have one of those days where you’re exhausted even though you didn’t do anything? 2020 is shaping up to be a full year of them. The Murder Hornets were merely a distraction from mosquitoes spreading EEE! This week both Denny O’Neil & Sir Ian Holm passed away.

Last week I proposed not writing something topical, which is why I’m not going to do the sensible thing to draw in readers by reviewing Kipo & The Age Of Wonderbeasts season two. (It may technically be the back half of season one based on production windows.) You should be watching this delightful series anyway. If only Karen Fukuhara could speak as much in live action roles as she gets to in animation! Apparently it began as a webcomic. Why must its merch be so pricey?

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Now, because no one demanded it, Cats cold takes!

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Gotham’s Ra’s Al Ghul Reborn!

One of the numerous DC adaptations not directly referenced in Crisis On Infinite Earths was Gotham. So this week I’ve made a custom of its Ra’s al Ghul! Except for the bits I changed because I didn’t like them. And the bits I made up because I couldn’t get sufficient reference for. So barely in the same ballpark as the show. Unfortunately this blog will not settle the epic controversy over the correct way to pronounce his name. I also mumble about The Batman movie that probably won’t have a themesong by The Edge.

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“My name is Ra’s al Ghul. I’m kind of a big deal.”

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Cats Is Hamilton For Furries?

I was more excited to see Cats than Episode IX! I had the option to get my alcohol before witnessing Cats, but I decided I needed to experience it stone cold sober. I survived because I’m a Lynx. (Did I just get knighted?) Before my semi-SPOILERish critique, listen to this surpise collaboreview with The Wages of Cinema! I did not expect Jack & Korey to go for it when I pitched a screening. (I liked it more than them.) Andrew chickened out, but I did steal this headline from him. “Like Hamilton for Furries!” should be on the posters.

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Birds Of Prey V. The Suicide Squad: Dawn Of Posters

WB released some tidbits about Birds Of Prey & The Suicide Squad. I’ll get to them, but this is merely an excuse to write about various DC Comics things in the backlog! I know you’re only coming here for my Gotham cold takes anyway.

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SDCC Turned Fifty?

HUZAH! It’s the fiftieth anniversary of San Diego Comic Convention! I didn’t attend, thanks for asking. (I took last week off anyway after reviewing Stranger Things 3.) Did you? Here is my armchair event coverage (loosely arranged by DC, Marvel, & miscellaneous mess) that’s rapidly losing topicality! Wait, shouldn’t it be celebrating it golden anniversary next year?

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Goodbye To Gotham!

Screw Avengers: Endgame’s opening night! I watched the series finale of Gotham like a sane person! Unlike last week, I came through on my promise. This could be my final chance to ramble about Gotham, so I best make the most of it! (Ha ha! I will find ways to never stop.) Below are SPOILERS for the conclusion of Batman’s origin show! Whoops! Now you know Bruce Wayne is Batman! But will they finally answer who has got ham? Yeah, it’s Lazlo Valentin. (I have grave doubts as to whether he has the credentials to support his sobriquet.)

Despite being only half a season, Fox still managed to insert multiple frustrating breaks between episodes. There was an eight-month time skip with no title card since the last batch of I recapped.  So we still don’t know how necessities got restocked or if the GCPD actually made much headway against assorted crimesters carving up the city. This is why we needed a full season! It feels somewhat petty to complain about this since so many shows get abruptly cancelled on cliffhangers, but there was clearly a lot more story to cover than the amount of episodes it had to work with. In an era where it’s common for even streaming series are too long, that is a rarity! The writers had a seven season plan but only got 4.5. If they’d known at the outset they’d only be getting 100 episodes total, I imagine they would’ve trimmed a lot of fat from season one.

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