Last week floated the question of whether I’d be reviewing the Hellboy reboot this week. The answer is … no. Sorry, everybody eagerly awaiting my review!
I both do & don’t want to see it. I really wanted Hellboy 3 by Guillermo del Toro starring Ron Perlman! Mike Mignola’s stark minimalism was almost diametrically opposed to del Toro’s lush maximalism but it worked! (I’ve heard gossip that Mignola being displeased with the movies diverging so much from the comics was a factor in nixing the third one.) I would’ve been fine seeing this one providing the trilogy had finished, but it didn’t. The monsters in the trailers (where Hellboy says he’s a Capricorn despite being a Libra in the comics) look nifty, but both general reviewers & Hellboy fans say it’s not good. I kind of feel bad skipping it since I’ll probably end up seeing the much worse looking Dark Phoenix in theaters. The original was released in April too, but I still think October would be a better fit (especially with all the competition this month). I was thinking about seeing it at a matinee, but the timing hasn’t worked out yet. Maybe I’ll get to it once it’s completely irrelevant?
So this almost late installment will mostly be about tangential Avengers tidbits that would’ve made my forthcoming review of the next movie even more long-winded.
Last week’s blog was short, but this one will be super long! If you don’t want to be spoiled by my The Umbrella Academy review, scroll to the second tilde for some Toy Fair news. Your attempts to keep me from seeing the Kim Possible movie have failed as well!
December dawns with the demise of Daredevil! Hot on the heels of the cancellations of Luke Cage & Iron Fist, Netflix destroyed the writers’ room’s dreams of a fourth season. Now I’m extra mad Bullseye didn’t have his own costume & Stilt-Man’s foreshadowing never came to fruition! (Tumblr is probably dying of self-inflicted wounds too, which reassures me that being too lazy to make a Tumblr was a wise move.) So Jessica Jones season three & Punisher season two look to be the end of the line for this hallway-battling venture, unless Netflix mercifully greenlights another season of The Defenders to tie up all the loose ends. Let’s belabor this point whilst awaiting coming attractions for the next Avengers! At least Captain Marvel marketing is punctual.
The GIF Ted has returned! This time Inhumans isn’t back to make it look a zillion times better in comparison. (Marvel may be overcompensating for that failure with the Death of the Inhumans miniseries.) The Gifted season 2 moves to Tuesday at 8, which is The Flash’s time slot. Not cool, Fox! This is as bad as Supergirl & Doctor Who competing against each other. Anyway, SPOILERS for “eMergence” emerge below! This season they’re doing M-titles because they ran out of X-words.
Valerie Vale & Silver St. Cloud in the house!
You’re quackers if you haven’t been watching the new DuckTales! It premiered around my kitty’s fifth birthday, & she just celebrated her sixth. It shouldn’t take a year to air twenty-four episodes! (Why are so many cartoons still beset by shoddy scheduling?) DuckTales has been slightly quicker about unveiling its secrets than Gravity Falls, Scooby-Doo: Mystery Incorporated, & The Venture Bothers. (Ooh, that’s back again with even more obscure continuity!) Now I’ll spoil those first season secrets! Or as I prefer to think of it, solving mysteries by rewriting history!
This week you’re getting a two-for-one review of Teen Titans Go! To The Movies (that exclamation mark in mid-title vexes me) & the first season of Cloak & Dagger! The former has fewer spoilers than the latter.
I remember when there was backlash against the Teen Titans cartoon for deviating from both the comics & the DCAU. After that wormed its way into audience’s hearts, there was backlash against Teen Titans Go! for seemingly disrespecting its predecessor. (I find it to be a better show than it gets credit for, though I only watch it infrequently.) Now we’re all united in hating the Titans trailer because it’s awful. (Does this mean we’ll have fond memories of Titans by the time the next reboot is teased?) Teen Titans Go! To The Movies makes DC Universe’s flagship series look even more embarrassing because it’s legitimutantly fun!
Last week, I wrote that I may be showing off another custom. The latest one turns out to be taking a little longer than expected. I thought about rushing to get it done in time before realizing San Diego Comic Con coverage starts this week. Rather than letting all my hard work get lost amidst the noise of coverage, I’m postponing that post. That way when I do upload it after my armchair SDCC coverage, it’ll be ignored for the right reasons.
So this week is a follow up to one of my least read posts of this year. It’s an evergreen article on books & cats, this time with a superior title. I say evergreen because it will perpetually be non-current. Spoilers for decades-old books away!