This week’s topic is The Sandman’s surprise episode & Cheryl Blossom in Riverdale season six. Why? Because there’s no overlap, that’s why! I was so preoccupied with whether or not I could, I didn’t stop to think if I should combine them! I’ve gone mad with limited power! Since virtually nobody else will be writing up the particular combo, it saves me the trouble of writing a less basic headline too. SPOILERS ahead for the combo you never knew you needed!
There have been numerous aborted attempts to adapt Neil Gaiman’s acclaimed The Sandman to live action for years. Netflix is the first to see it to fruition. Or one could argue it’s runner-up to Fox’s Lucifer, whose eponymous piano bar Devil & Mazikeen were spin-offs. David Goyer is one of the executive producers, which is worrisome. Allan Heinberg as the other executive producer & showrunner is less alarming. I wasn’t sure what to make of its trailers. Does it live up to its reputation of being Sleepwalker done wrong?
Sayonara, San Diego! A new age of wonderment is upon us! Riverdale is now all aboard the cuckoo bananas supernatural train! This formerly listless show finally got onto some rails. They may be rails of coke but rails nonetheless. Huzzah for season 6(66)! Sometimes I think the cast deserves hazard pay for reciting their dialogue. The cruel premature cancellation of Legends Of Tomorrow inflicted so much psychic trauma upon me that Riverdale now fills me with excitement rather than ennui. (I’m a very disturbed individual.) Shun the nonbelievers that claim season six jumped the shark! Verily Riverdale finally blossomed into its ideal self. I’m extra mad at seasons four & five sucking so badly that they made viewers quit before this legitimutantly good season.
It’s kind of genius that all the mundane context for these characters was laid out well in advance of the spooky stuff. It’d have to vie for attention if it were horror from the outset. The supernatural storylines feel better less nonsensical than the supposedly realistic ones of seasons past. (I got “Twin Babies Levitating Over a Fire as Part of a Cult Ritual Led by Chad Michael Murray” in the “What Riverdale Subplot Are You?” quiz!) They’re better foreshadowed than the gobbledygook The Flash has been spewing lately too. Now that it’s genuinely supernatural, the kooky character motivations & loopy internal logic actually make more sense. Strap in cause I’ve got fifteen more episodes full of weird mysteries to synopsize. If you bailed earlier, you won’t believe the following are real SPOILERS & not me slowly dying from a gas leak!
After a two year absence, San Diego Comic Con returned in collective figurative person to San Diego! As a germaphobe on a limited budget, I did not partake of the festivities directly. I enjoyed the virtual panels that I used to be able to stream at home, but they’ve been discontinued. While I couldn’t observe the Gremlins: Secrets Of The Mogwai panel, I’m relived Tze Chun meeting Greta went great. Despite what crazy people on The Twitter insisted, neither Henry Cavill nor Elizabeth Olsen showed up! The amount of Everything Everywhere All At Once cosplay I saw secondhand pleased me.
I was planning on doing one of my non-review blogs after Thor Part IV & Ms. Marvel’s inaugural season, but a heatwave of the non-Mick Rory variety struck. I can work when it’s too hot or too cold. I need a temperature-regulating gimp suit like Scorpius. Then I got hung up obsessing over SDCC tidbits from another timezone. So I realized nobody would bother reading a non-SDCC article from me. I doubt anyone even wants to read an SDCC retrospective from me, but sometimes you have to write a low stakes blog to remind visitors there’ll be better blogs soon. If you share my incredibly narrow interests, this armchair SDCC coverage is the overview for you! It goes action figures, Marvel, & DC. As usual, no actual comic book news will be involved!
The final two movie length episodes of Stranger Things season four pick up where the last batch left off. The first seven of nine episodes were lacking in Jeri Ryan. How about the Canada Day continuation? SPOILERS for something you’ve probably already binged! This’ll be a good cheat sheet for pretending to be hip at Fourth Of July cocktail parties too. While this season has great posters, these episodes may be too intense for goblin kitties!
It’s trendy to dunk on Stranger Things now for its diminishing returns, but I’m much more interested in it than the latest unnecessary Star Wars prequel since it’s not stuck in a narrative cull de sac. The first seven of nine premiered the same week as Obi-Wan Kenobi. Since that’s airing weekly, I can review it later anyway without being late. SPOILERS for season four except the two episodes they haven’t released yet are on the other side of this break. The main draw for this review is that you can read it in a fraction of the time it takes to watch all these!
We bid you welcome to The Wages Of Cinema collaboreview for Doctor Strange In The Multiverse Of Madness! Do you need to see WandaVision before Dr. Strange 2? If you don’t have Disney+ like our control group, Andrew, scope out this review first. I’m dropping additional thoughts on the series afterwards anyway.
Is there even a point to this now that Everything Everywhere All At Once exists? Its international titles are on point. I would’ve gone with Dr. Strangemom, Or How I Stopped Worrying & Learned To Love The Multiverse. I’m not going to argue with Jamie Lee Curtis!
Can we live in the altverse where The CW gives Legends Of Tomorrow the final season it deserves? Is this sequel actually about Dr. Strange, or is he merely filler betwixt multiverse cameos? Does DSITMOM distract from thinking about Natalie Portman’s arms in Thor: Love & Thunder? Grab a popcorn cube & prepare for SPOILERS! Don’t even read the tags if you want to be surprised by cameos.
Before we get to the Moon Knight meat, I implore you not to give up the fight to get Legends Of Tomorrow a proper conclusion in the face of premature cancellation. I just sent a three page email to HBO Max, Warner Bros. TV, & Netflix in an effort to save the Beeboverse’s best show. Let’s screw things up for the better!
Where’s Moon Knight’s bread? He should eat only croissants! Hopefully Moon Knight works out better than the last time Oscar Isaac played an Egyptian-flavored Marvel character that’s space slut adjacent. This is the first of the D+ series not to headline a pre-existing MCU character. Ms. Marvel & She-Hulk will follow his lead. So get your psyche straight for SPOILERS! Bill Sienkiewicz’s cover for Empire is better than the photo variant. Check out his awesome nine panel action grid!
I finally got my obligatory annual cat post out of the way. (Now they tell me the cat blogging tips?) That oughta keep the Meow Mafia off my lap for a little while. Now here’s SPOILERS for how the last four installments of “The Flash: Armageddon” & “Rivervale” transpired plus a bit of bonus Beebo & ZEP!
I finally got around to publishing my annual cat post! As usual, it contains anecdotes about my kitty & assorted cat links with minimal narrative cohesion. Many of the links I’d collected over the year turned out to be from retricted or deleted accounts the day before just to make this more challenging. I even found new things to say about Cats. So bully for you if that’s what you’ve been waiting for from my blog! If not, come back soon for the forthcoming The Flash Armageddon, Rivervale, Spider-Man: No Way Home, & Hawkeye reviews torrent! Maybe I’ll enjoy some of them more than Batwoman’s third season?