Brother Banenose Is Becoming!

Buy The Dolorous Adventure of Brother Banenose RIGHT NOW!

The Dolorous Adventure of Brother Banenose is finished! All of the required documents have been sent to Booktrope. Nobody is more impressed than me, since I started writing it in high school but have since matriculated. Clearly I lack the work ethic of Lou Bloom from Nightcrawler (sadly not starring the fuzziest blue mutie, Kurt Bamfenstein). So to celebrate, here’s the blog debut of a painting (unless you count it being in both trailers) with an excerpt & hashtag on top.rbac2

This was the first painting done of Fairuza & the baboon (who has a name, you know!). Maybe I’ll tell you more about their secret origins someday.

Today’s title says The Dolorous Adventure of Brother Banenose is (be)coming, but you can actually get it RIGHT NOW!  SURPRISE! Barnes & Noble just has the NOOK edition at the moment, but you can get the paperback & Kindle edition at Amazon. More vendors should roll out soon. Yours, dear reader, are definitely the right hands for this book to fall into. If you could review it after you’ve read it, that’d be awesome. Many thanks in advance for your gracious patronage. I’d like to thank everyone at Booktrope who helped make this happen!

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Better Exposure Through Defacement

The Dolorous Adventure of Brother Banenose is now listed on Goodreads. I’ll be updating it with more information as I receive it. When the book comes out, that’ll be one of the places for you to slag it off.

You’ve already seen the cover, so now behold the marketing. I’ve specially defaced one of my paintings so that you’ll have your first glimpse of the writing within. It even has the #BrotherBanenose hashtag that only I’ve used. Maybe I should’ve gone with #TDAOBB instead.

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Uncovering Brother Banenose’s Cover!

Remember back when I showed you the painting that would part of the cover? Well now i can finally reveal the finished front! Click below to see it unveiled in all its splendor! Of course if you’ve been directed here via social media, you’ve probably already been spoiled. But click onward anyway because I wrote some more stuff afterwards.

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TANTO FIGHT!!!

Happy Day Without Sports, otherwise known as the day after Bastille Day! It’s my favorite holiday so I celebrate it 365 days a year! In honor of this momentous occasion, here’s that painting of a knife fight that I told you about. This is definitely not a sport. Somebody could die!

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Now you can see for yourself that I did a terrible job making it look like X-Men Adventures #6. First of all, there are way too many characters in it. My compositions are getting progressively more crowded. You’ll notice the titular Brother Banenose, the tooth-be-necklaced Fairuza, & the mighty Stephfi. You also get your first looks at Norbert the false pig specialist & the All-Seeing Insect of Doom! Lastly, we have the clothing-deficient [CHARACTER NAME REDACTED BECAUSE IT’S A SPOILER]!

Originally, I had intended to paint an entirely different scene for this chapter. Then I remembered I kind of made a big deal about the tanto fight so I should probably paint that. It also did not require me to paint a ceiling like the alternate scene so it won. My difficult second novel might be set entirely outdoors to completely circumvent the possible necessity of depicting ceilings.

Most books would put such a thrilling scene at the climax, but not mine! This happens in chapter ten, which is roughly the halfway point. So things can only escalate from there! Unless everything is downhill after that. I’ll let you be the judge. But first have a look at the even behind-the-scenesier uninked sketch for the painting that didn’t scan that well:

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If you would like to spread awareness of The Dolorous Adventure of Brother Banenose on The Twitter, please use the hashtag  #BrotherBanenose. You can alternatively use #TheDolorousAdventureOfBrotherBanenose if you a lot of characters leftover that you’d like to use up. If you go for the acronym #TDAOBB, nobody will know what you’re typing about.

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Title Goes Here?

Unfortunately there’s no exciting The Dolorous Adventure of Brother Banenose news this week. Unless you consider me painting a knife fight exciting. It homages the cover of X-Men Adventures #6 by looking nothing like it. Do you like knife fights in your novels?

I finally saw Mad Max: Fury Road & it rocked my face off. Je suis les yeux sans visage. Avoid this movie if you value your skull skin! I’m renaming my cat Impurrator Furryosa!

We stand on guard for thee! Happy belated Canada Day! This really should’ve gone up yesterday.

My pals at The Wages of Cinema compared me to the late Sir Christopher Lee. I didn’t even need to bribe them!

Considering how amazing his life was, I’m surprised Christopher Lee isn’t more memetic. These are my humble contributions:

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If Star Wars was more realistic, at least half of Darth Vader’s dialogue would be “Did I ever tell you about the time Christopher Lee sliced my arm off?” You’re imagining that in James Earl Jones’s voice right now, aren’t you?

Vote  Gamorrean Guards into the 6″ Star Wars Black Series toy line!

Matt The Catania cleared 2,000 visitors last week! Thank you to new & repeat guests alike! My goal is to get at least one guest from each nation. In case you can’t find my social links under the widget, look me up on Goodreads, Facebook, & The Twitter. Tell all your friends about me!

Oversize Scanners Are Dead! Long Live Oversize Scanners!

After weeks of merely telling you The Dolorous Adventure of Brother Banenose will be published by Booktrope, I now have something to show for it. Feast your eyes on the brand new painting I made for its cover:

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I Want You To Want To Read Me!

Hola, faithful readers from a variety of nations! I realize that there are scads of blogs competing for your attention, but you’ve chosen (for the moment) to read mine. I’m honored!* It feels like I’m writing in an echo chamber, however, because I haven’t received many comments from people like you. I’d chalk up the silence to “you’re doing everything right; no need for us to interrupt,” but I’m not sure I’m that egotistical. So I’m looking for your feedback on how I can ensure Matt The Catania: Almost Clever! is a blog you’d like to continue reading.

I’ve come across plenty of blogs where the author has a very focused mission statement:

“I love writing/photography/cooking/acting/gardening/fencing/taxidermy/etc.! I think about it 24/7! Whenever I’m unable to do this specific activity, life  loses all its value!”

I feel somewhat aberrant in comparison because I don’t have one overwhelming passion. Instead I possess a diversified array of obssessions because I want to be a dilettante when I grow up. Do you, however, have a preference for me to focus on specific topics rather than others?

As you may have already noticed, I sometimes write things. I’ve even been paid to do this. making me a professional writer. While I’m not going to post a full length novel here, I think I could manage the occasional short story. I do poetry for glory. Are you interested in more behind the scenes peeks at articles I’ve written for Topless Robot, io9, & Legal As She Is Spoke? Is there a particular format or topic you’d like me to cover? Are my musings too verbose or too succinct?

I like making movies, but unfortunately there won’t be many of my own here. This is simply because I don’t personally own filmographic equipment & it takes lots of people working together to make something worth watching. I can show you various videos I’ve cameoed in for friends. I may even make a guest appearance in one of your films if you ask! Otherwise I have plenty of anecdotes about FILLER! That’s what everybody needs, right?

Consuming culture is another thing that I do. Afterwards I analyze it. So I could critique novels, comic books, TV shows, & movies for you. The problem is that there are already so many outlets that already do that. I’d have to think of a unique way to make my rambling reviews radically relevant from the rest. Do you have any suggestions.

I’m an avid action figure aficionado. I’m even customized some. I’ve also built model kits. Would you be interested in me posting digital photographs of those here? I also  provide many cat & vacation snaps as alternatives.

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Nightcrawler has ported in to break up all the text. (Why can’t he just wear his classic costume in the movies since they’ve established he has the same circus background as the comics? Or have velvety blue fur instead of weirdly elaborate scars?) Do you like these sorts of things? Have you ever been compelled to share these “memes” about on The Interwuzzle? Also, do you prefer having to click on really long posts to see the entirety or would you rather they take up as much of the front page as needed?

Most of my art is done with pencil or paint. Do you like to see planning sketches or just finished pieces? Next week I’d like to discuss another painting for The Dolorous Adventure of Brother Banenose. I have three paintings in various stages of completion & three that are ready for viewing. Based on these extremely vague titles, which would you prefer me blog about next?
1. theft
2. pursuit
3. pounce

So tell me in the comments section below (or on my Fan Page or The Twitter) how I can provide content that’s more relevant to your interests. Even one reader’s comment can shape the course of this blog! Will it be yours?

*”HONOR!” is a registered trademarked of Prince Zuko