If you can read this, congratulations on making it through The Year Of The Bastard! History books will be indebted to Warren Ellis for this phrase. Anyhoo, we begin the new cycle with cold takes on TV, books, & a film retrospective that’s essentially a clip show. I’m not even starting out the new year fresh! At least my hyperlinks are almost the Pantone Color of the Year?
I’m quite perturbed they waited until after my Netflix subscription lapsed to finally release Black Mirror series four at 2017’s tail end. Thanks to my pals, Jack & Korey, however, I was able to spend New Year’s Day watching it. This show has such a stupendous batting average! Now I’m going to predominantly SPOIL “USS Callister.”
I couldn’t afford to watch Star Trek Discovery. (I’ve never seen so many people eager to catch STD!) So against my better judgment, I watched both of the new TV series about Marvel Comics’ genetic superhumans, Inhumans & The Gifted. So strap in for an extra long spoilerific double review!
The best part of discount Thor featuring lunar muties was that my cat tried to ensnuggle me for 3/4 of it. Brought to you by the man who gifted the world with lumberjack Dexter & dragon-free Iron Fist, Inhumans shows glimpses of cool stuff only to yank them away. I may have some controversial views on the state of Lucasfilm, but I think we can all agree that Marvel Studios letting Scott Buck helm two series was a mistake. Did it lose a contractual bet with Sony or Fox to make Inhumans’ cinematic demotion as underwhelming as possible? It’s a pity this is set when when the Agents of SHIELD are indisposed because it could desperately use some charismatic protagonists (not to mention their writers). None of the visuals justified IMAX cameras. ABC can’t make this miniseries look as good as even one of The CW’s four DC series. It takes itself way too seriously without the necessary prerequisite of actuality being quality.
The villain is an abolitionist. Go home, 2017! You’re drunk!
Happy 50th Birthday, Star Trek! Had I realized this earlier, I would’ve saved my review of “A Piece of the Action” for this week. So instead I’ll be reviewing a vintage episode of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. They both have ties to Paramount & Playmates so it’s not as random as it could be.
Wingnut & Screwloose will finally be on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles this week! (I just noticed I have both “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” & “TMNT” tags. Which should I be using?) I am way too excited about this! In the meantime, checkout this TMNT short by Jhonen Vasquez.
So Ben Affleck randomly released test footage of Deathstroke on the Twitter. This version of Slade Wilson looks great although, just like with Magneto, I miss his studded gorget. I can’t believe how vibrant the blue, orange, & silver are!
He’s awful squinty, but odds are it’s Joe “remember when I was Flash Thompson?” Manganiello (who was hinted at for the role while Suicide Squad was being made) … or a random stuntman. It’s been rumored Deathstroke will be the prime antagonist for the solo Batfleck movie that’s not in production yet, so way to spoil the Justice League’s after credits scene, Affleck! Pitting Batman against Slade Wilson is an unorthodox choice, but I’ll embrace it if it spares us more of Jared Leto’s Joker. What if the Batfleck film is inspired by Beware The Batman, & the big showdown is Deathstroke vs. Alfred Pennyworth?